Chairman and the Church
by Adrelaide
Summary: A request from chairmanmeowww on Tumblr. Alec brings over Church to play with the Chairman and the adventures that ensue are as fluffy as a pair of kittens. Written in cats' P.O.V. Fluff. Chow. Malec.
1. Chapter 1

**Chairman and the Church. Part 1. for Chairmanmeowww.**

The Chairman didn't like it when his warlock and human went into the bedroom.

Then again, he didn't like it when they decided to mate out in the living room either. Or the kitchen. Or the bathroom. Though, ever since the bathtub incident of exactly six months, three days and four hours ago, he avoided that room completely.

Back to the bedroom.

Sometime his warlock and, more recently acquired, human would go to the bedroom and sleep, which in that case, the Chairman would slink in and lie down on his human's pillow and nap with them. Most nights however, the mattress would creak and the Chairman would have to sit outside in the living room, alone, a lot of times without dinner. His warlock had problems with remembering to feed him, and usually his human was good enough to leave some food out, but it was hard when his warlock was busy putting his mouth on places that made him a cannibal.

Eventually the noise would die down, and he'd still be locked out of the bedroom, leaving claw marks on his warlock's furniture just because the Chairman honestly thought he deserved his own personal scratching post for his troubles. His warlock changed the furniture enough times, so it hardly mattered either way. Few things the Chairman did these days did.

When his warlock and human came that night, the Chairman spotted the occasional looks the two would share, and he curled into a ball on the sofa, already plotting how he was going to carve up the wooden peg legs the couch sat on.

His ears twitched when he heard the sound of something hard hitting the floor. The cat paused for a moment, before he lifted his head over the arm of the sofa, hissing when he saw the Box of Doom. It was prison incarnate, with it's sturdy plastic and barred door. His warlock found the time to occasionally lock the Chairman away in the cruel Box, bringing him to a place where positively demonic humans pricked your with needles and shoved things where things were definitely _not_ supposed to go.

His human was saying something, his tone somewhat annoyed. The Chairman watched with slitted eyes as he knelt down to open the Box of Doom. If either of them thought he was going in there without a fight, they were in for a night of scratches up and down their arms. His warlock said something lightly as the door swung open, and the Chairman sat up completely when a cat stepped from the Box of Doom, shifting out onto the floor of the loft.

The cat was regal. That was the only way the Chairman knew how to describe him, and even that didn't seem like a nice enough word. His coat was a blueish grey, his eyes a pretty gold that reminded him of his warlock, only better. And he was bigger than the Chairman, though it might have been all of his fur. The cat looked over the loft, before his yellow gaze rested on him. Like a scared kitten, the Chairman ducked his head, burrowing against the arm of the couch in embarrassment.

Why had his warlock and human brought another cat home in the Box of Doom? The Chairman went rigid. Was the new cat supposed to replace him? Did they not want him anymore? A small yowl escaped his mouth at the thought. He wasn't anything like this new cat. His white coat was shabby compared to that pretty blue-grey. He was tiny, even with all of his fur puffed out in anger.

His human said something, followed by his warlock, but the Chairman didn't care. He buried his face into the nook of the sofa, content to die there.

He sneezed on a cloud of glitter.

A light weight jumped onto the couch, and the Chairman looked over to see the new cat sitting on the cushion next to him, studying him with those serious golden eyes. The Chairman tensed scrambling into a crouch, ready to spring away at a moment's notice. If anything, this only humored the other cat, who bared his teeth in amusement.

"So, you're the owner of all the white fur Alec comes home covered in." The Chairman paused, tilting his head to the side. The cat had a weird way of talking, both in his voice, and in the way his chose his words.

"I have white fur." He agreed, turning to face the cat, settling into a sitting position. He was tense though, his tail flicking nervously against the sofa. "And Alec is my human." He said, not without a touch of pride. The other cat frowned at this, his eyes narrowing.

"I've known Alec since he was a kitling. He was my human first." The Chairman stood up, his fur bristling.

"He's _my_ human!" He hissed back. Sure, it was annoying when his warlock and human got into one of their bedroom moods, but his human was a good human. The best kind of human.

The kind that remembered to feed him.

The cat merely looked at him. "And how, exactly, is he _your_ human?" The cat strode forward, and the Chairman shuffled away. "Did you catch the diseased mice that tried to sneak into his bed at night? Did you warn him about the intruders that came knocking at the door of the Institute? Did you help him find his lost dagger, the one his father gave him before leaving for Alicante?" Each question made the Chairman shrink, until he was nothing more then a ball of fur against the back of the sofa.

"I didn't eat his friend when he turned into a rat." The Chairman said meekly, looking up at the other cat. He was greeted by a curious look. It wasn't a rare thing for a cat to be curious, but it was surprisingly cute on this particular cat.

"How old are you?" The cat asked, sitting back on his haunches.

"Two." The Chairman said, straightening up. "I just had my birthday party." He added, wondering if this new cat got birthday parties. This answer seemed to satisfy the other cat, and he turned away, apparently content.

"That explains a lot." The cat sent him a glance. "You're nothing but a kitten. I bet you drink the entire bowl of cream without a thought as to how it'll make you sick later."

"Cream doesn't make you sick!" The thought alone horrified the Chairman. The other cat looked amused.

"It does if you have too much." He said, and the Chairman struggled to process this thought, his gaze dropping to the purple leather of the couch. He didn't realize that the cat had moved closer until he caught sight of that blue-grey fur at the edge of his vision. He looked up, and stared into big golden eyes. "What's your name?"

"W-What's yours?" The Chairman retorted, shifting back, nearly crushing his tail against the arm of the couch.

"Church." The cat answered without missing a beat. "And you?" The Chairman paused, processing the name. He looked like a Church. Name-wise, not building-wise.

"It's Chairman. Chairman Meow." He said, and Church did the equivalent of a cat grin, purring deeply in his throat. The sound caused the Chairman's spine to tingle, and he purred back, his tail flicking back against the couch. He jumped when the sofa creaked, looking up to see his human staring down at them with bright blue eyes. He said something, and his warlock appeared over the back of the couch, grinning widely. Not a moment later they were heading towards the bedroom, and the Chairman had a feeling his food bowl was going to be empty for the rest of the night. "But I'm hungry!" He yowled at the closed door, looking over his shoulder when Church spoke up.

"Then eat." The Chairman glowered at him.

"I can't." He said back, annoyed. Church's ear twitched.

"Why not?"

"Because they'll be in there all night. And my warlock leaves the food in a bag on the kitchen counter. I can't reach it on my own, I'm too small." He thought of that long rise to the counter. Even with his nails digging into the wood of the counter, he couldn't climb high enough to reach the bag of food. He'd certainly tried before. Church was looking at him thoughtfully, his tail waving lazily behind him.

"Show me." Was all the other cat said, before jumping off the couch, padding lightly across the floor. After a moment the Chairman jumped down, springing ahead a few steps, leading the other cat into the kitchen. He sat down, looking up at the tall wall that held his food captive. He looked over to see Church giving the counter a long look.

Suddenly, the cat crouched, before lunging upwards, jumping high enough to clear the counter in one jump. The Chairman watched in awe, staring at the brief flick of Church's tail before it disappeared over the edge of the countertop.

"Watch out." Was Church's only warning, the bag of food suddenly tipping over the edge of the counter. The Chairman dove out of the way as the bag of food hit the floor, splitting open and scattering all over the tile. The Chairman gasped in delight, jumping forward to bury his face into the pile of chow. He was too busy to notice Church jump back onto the floor, the cat sitting down and watching the Chairman eat. "You're going to get sick if you keep that up."

"Mphn nahh hmpt grrag." The Chairman replied artfully, head still bowed. Church was staring at him with a carefully blank expression, his tail flicking lightly in the air.

Exactly eleven minutes later the Chairman fell back on the kitchen floor, his stomach feeling horrifically bloated. The cat mewed pitifully, lying out on his side in the pile of scattered cat food. He felt a wetness against his ear, and peeled open an eye to see Church licked at his ears comfortingly.

"I told you so." Church stated in between licks. The Chairman whined, closing his eyes and letting the other cat groom him. By the time the Chairman felt well enough to move, Church had groomed his entire head, along with his shoulders, all the way down to his paws. The Chairman twisted onto his feet unsteadily, shaking out his fur.

"Thank you." He said, looking to the other cat. Church didn't say anything, but the Chairman could tell by the way his tail was wagging that he was happy. "How'd you do that?" He asked, pointing his chin towards the high counter-top.

"You learn a lot of things catching mice." Church replied, his ears twitching. "Come on, Alec and Magnus are done in the bedroom. We can sneak in now." The Chairman followed the other cat out into the living room, eying the closed bedroom door.

"I don't want to go in there." Chairman said, earning a surprised look from Church. "It always smells weird after their moods, and they're gross and sweaty. The couch is better." He gave the piece of furniture a long look. "It's just so big and lonely." He said quietly, jumping when he felt Church brush against him. The older cat hopped up onto the couch, before turning to stare at the Chairman for a long moment.

"Are you coming? Or am I going to sleep here all by myself?" The Chairman paused, before jumping up as well. Church was curled up in the corner of the couch, his tail curled against his body. The Chairman hesitated for only a moment, before he trotted over and wedged himself against Church's side. If the other cat minded he didn't say anything, and the Chairman was purring contently at the warmth of the other cat's body.

"I don't mind bedroom moods if you're here." The Chairman said, resting his chin on Church's paw. Church didn't say anything back, but the Chairman could hear the rumbling purr in the other cat's throat, as well as feel the thumping of Church's tail against his spine. "I really don't mind at all." He yawned, before closing his eyes and falling asleep.

* * *

"I'm serious, Magnus! Give it back!" Alec yelled, his face red as the warlock typed away on the Shadowhunter's cell phone. He was naked except for the black sweatpants riding low on his hips, something that caused Magnus' fingers to stutter over the keys.

"Dear Jace," Magnus wrote, the only thing saving him from Alec's wrath was the ring of blue fire around him. The warlock was shirtless as well, his pants a dazzling purple. "I'm sorry I won't be able to go out on patrol tonight either, Magnus' screwed me too hard last night and-" The warlock ducked under the Nephilim when Alec dove over the line of fire, snapping his fingers and running off when the ring disappeared. He burst out of his bedroom and into the loft, laughing the entire time, Alec on his heels.

"_Magnus!_" Said warlock circled around the couch, skidding to a stop when he looked down at the cushions. Alec crashed into him moments later, and the pair would have ended up sprawled out on the floor if Magnus had been just a few inches shorter. Alec snatched his phone from the warlock's hand, double-checking to make sure his boyfriend hadn't actually sent the text. "I can't believe you would joke about that, do have any idea how long I'd have to put up with-"

"Alec, look." Magnus said, a grin plastered on his face. The Shadowhunter looked at Magnus, before following his gaze to the couch. Alec wasn't exactly a cat fanatic, but he had to admit, the sight before his was cute.

Church and Chairman Meow were nestled against each other, both of them sound asleep in the corner of the sofa, resting against each other easily. It was too precious for words.

"Aww..." Alec managed, and Magnus chuckled.

"See? I told you bringing him here was a good idea." The warlock said, wrapping his arms around Alec's hips and tugging his boyfriend closer. Alec sent the warlock a half-hearted glare.

"I still feel like taking him out of the Institute was a bad idea. He's kinda like our guard cat." He flushed when Magnus kissed his temple. "And I'm still mad at you about stealing my phone."

"Oh, Alexander, whatever shall I do with you?" Magnus asked to no one in particular. "Tell you what, we'll plan ahead next time. I'll bring the Chairman over for dinner at the Institute. We'll dress them up and make spaghetti. It'll be _Lady and the Tramp_, only Chairman and the Church."

"_Lady and the Tramp_?" Alec echoed, confused. Magnus looked personally insulted.

"We'll make it a movie night as well.

* * *

A/N: So, my Mac is finally fixed, and stories are progressing along quite nicely! Here's a little something to hold you guys over until I can edit them up to posting level. Also, I know I post requests that people send me, but if you truly want me to consider a request then please make an appeal on Tumblr. I don't know if I can accept that many, but if I do, I'd rather have a screenname to dedicate to you with. :)

Reviews are adorable! Just like the Chairman!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chairman and the Church. Part 2. For highwarlockofaustralia.**

Church knew that the Chairman was coming over tonight. Alec and the others clearly didn't understand that the cat was more than capable of understanding human speech at his age, but that was fine. All the easier to know what was going around the Institute from the human perspective. But Church didn't have all day to worry over human affairs. Chairman Meow was coming, and the dangerous Institute wasn't ready for a kitten from such a pampered home.

He spent a majority of his afternoon chasing down rats the size of the Chairman and leaving them in a pile outside Alec's door for the Shadowhunter to get rid of. It was the human's idea to invite the Chairman and Magnus over, after all, he might as well help out. After that Church drove away insects into their cracks in the rafters and took note of the older pieces of furniture that wobbled precariously when you hit them too hard. Chairman Meow was an accident waiting to happen, like a stick of lit dynamite even; both were sudden and disastrous for all parties involved. When he was finished Church settled down in one of the lower archways above the lift and napped until the Chairman arrived.

He blinked open an eye when the elevator sounded a greeting. He stretched out each of his legs, preparing himself, before dropping down from the archway and startling Alec. The Shadowhunter glowered at him in greeting.

"What was with the pile of dead rats outside my room?" Alec asked, his tone icy.

The Church simply mewed at him, before turning his attention to the elevator. The motor stopped and grate slid back. Enter the warlock, cat carrier in hand. Magnus looked like a tornado of blue and green and gray, relatively normal compared to some of the outfits Church had spotted him in over the years. Maybe Alec was rubbing off on him. Church turned his attention to the cat carrier, eying the box of plastic and metal warily, at least until he heard the Chairman screech loudly from within.

"LET ME GO!" The Chairman yowled, hissing angrily in the cat carrier. "I'M NOT SEEING THE EVIL HUMANS LET ME OUT!" Magnus sighed loudly over the cat's wails, setting the box down and throwing himself into Alec's arms.

"My cat is the devil! He carved up my arms when I was putting him in his carrier like he didn't _want_ to come see his boyfriend. Speaking of which, how are you, darling?" Church snuffled, striding forward to sit in front of the gate. Chairman Meow froze, before he pawed at the metal door.

"Let me out!" The Chairman whined pitifully, his tail twitching nervously behind him. Church sighed, shaking his head and meowing loudly at Alec and Magnus. Magnus currently had his lips sealed over the Alec's, his hands up the other's shirt. Church yowled louder and louder, and finally Magnus pulled away.

"Your cat is clearly the devil too, Alexander. They're perfect together. My OTP."

"OT-what?" Alec stuttered, shoving his shirt back down over his waist.

"Don't worry about it." Magnus crouched down and undid the latch to the Chairman's cat carrier. The kitten didn't hesitate, shooting out of the box faster than a bat out of hell. Church watched the Chairman streak down the hall, walking after the cat calmly. "Now, where were we..."

Chairman Meow was running around the hallway in surprisingly wide circles. The cat would slide to a stop before he nearly ran into a wall, bolting off in the opposite direction in a panicked frenzy.

"Where am I? WHERE AM I?" He yelled, turning around and running blindly at Church. Church hopped up on a chair before the kitten nearly ran him over, lounging on the soft fabric and letting the Chairman wear himself out. When the kitling fell down in front of him with a flop, his chest rising and falling as he caught his breath, Church spoke.

"You're in my home." He told the younger cat. "Magnus brought you here so he'd have an excuse to visit Alec. They've made food though, so I don't mind." He jumped down next to the Chairman.

"Your home is big." He looked up. "And tall."

"This is part of an old church. It's used to impress humans that come to visit. The rest of the Institute isn't so grand." Church explained, proud of his territory nonetheless. While the Chairman's small loft suited the kitten, the Institute was a far better bed for the older cat. "I cleaned up the Institute so you wouldn't get yourself killed." Chairman sat up, stars dancing in his eyes.

"Really?" He mewed, "For me?" Church snuffled, turning and walking down the hallway. After a moment the Chairman bounded after him. Church's tailed flicked once to the side, catching Chairman Meow's shoulder.

"Did Magnus feed you last night?" Church asked, leading the Chairman towards the kitchen.

"Uh, um. I don't remember." The Chairman admitted, earning a strange look from Church. His ears fell back against his head. "What?" Church shook his head.

"It's nothing. Alec made spaghetti." Church strutted into the kitchen, the homiest room in the Institute. Alec and Magnus were nowhere to be seen, but the cat would have bet 8 of his 9 lives on the fact that they were busy in Alec's room. "There are meatballs too." He added, hopping up on the kitchen table. He looked over his shoulder to see the Chairman scramble up one of the kitchen chairs with difficulty. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah!" Chairman Meow grunted, nearing hitting his head on the side of the table, before climbing onto that as well. "What's spaghetti?" He asked once he was sitting next to Church.

"Human food. Not that enjoyable, but meatballs are delicious." Church walked over to a covered ceramic plate, pawing at the warm surface. He could barely make out the delicacy through foggy glass lid.

"What are they?" Chairman sounded excited by the idea of trying something new.

"Balls of ground beef." Church clarified, tensing when the Chairman wedged his way against him. Chairman Meow pawed at the glass despairingly.

"It's closed! Are you going to push it off the edge to break it? Can I help?" Church shook his head.

"No, it'll get glass in the food." Church frowned before using his nose to nudge the glass lid off. It was a mistake, one that Church regretted the second hot steam escaped from under the lid, singing his sensitive nose. It was like the one time he'd ventured too close to the fireplace as a kitten. He hissed, jerking back and away from the dish with a loud clatter, swiping at his nose until he realized that it only made pain worse.

"Are you okay!?" The Chairman was looking at him in alarm, Church tried to breathe out of his nose, only to find that it was completely numb.

"I think I singed my nose." He said hesitantly, trying to adjust to the different scents that assaulted his nose. It felt like his entire face had been thrown in a batch of hot water. "It's difficult to breathe through it." The Chairman was out the door in a second, running down the hall yelling loudly the entire time.

"WARLOCK! WARLOCK COME HERE RIGHT NOW! COME HERE OR I WILL BITE THE HUMAN!" The Chairman all but ran into the closest door in the hallway, clawing wildly at the door and meowing hysterically until the door opened up to reveal a girl.

"Wh-what, aren't you Magnus' cat?" Chairman vaguely realized that this was not his human, but rather his human's litter mate. They had the same dark coat of fur on their heads, though the female's was more well-groomed. The female had also visited his home on several occasions to fetch his human to go outside and play. Chairman thought back to Church and began to yowl loudly, until the female knelt to pick him up. The cat darted away, towards the kitten, looking to see that female followed, yowling the entire time. She did, like they were playing tag. But this was no time for games! He rounded the corner and entered the room, scrambling back onto the table.

"I found Alec's litter mate!" Chairman said, scrambling up onto the table and pressing his body against Church's comfortingly. Church looked at the Chairman in exasperation, before meowing piteously at Isabelle. Isabelle came closer and looked at the pair in utter confusion.

"What are you doing on the table with Magnus' cat, Church?" Isabelle looked around, probably for Magnus or Alec, before turning back towards the hallway. "ALEC!" She yelled, loud enough for both the Chairman and Church to cringe. "THE CATS ARE EATING ALL OF MY COOKING!" Moments later Alec slid into the kitchen archway, an expression of horror on his face. His shirt was half-hanging off of his body, the button of his jeans undone. There was a healthy flush to his cheeks.

"Oh, by the Angel. I thought-"

"That they were in the process of being poisoned?" Isabelle finished, flipping her hair over her shoulder, her eyes as hard as onyx. "Magnus' cat practically clawed up the bottom of my door trying to get my attention."

"He does that." Magnus said upon entering the room. He looked as disheveled as Alec, and Church could smell the scent of satisfaction that came along with mating. Magnus made his way over to the table, his eyes resting on first the Chairman, then Church. "Something wrong, old friend?" He asked, reaching out to Church. He picked the cat up, cradling him in his arms while Alec and Isabelle stared in amazement. Not surprising, they probably didn't remember their childhoods spent tugging on his tail. It was why he didn't let them hold him anymore. Church mewed at the warlock, sounding as annoyed as the Chairman was frantic. Sparks crackled from Magnus' fingertips, and Church felt the painful tingle in his nose fade away. "There, all better?" Magnus asked, setting Church on the table. Church snuffled out a breath. Chairman Meow wedged himself back against Church's side, butting his head determinedly with his nose. Isabelle rolled her eyes, exiting the kitchen with another flip of her hair.

"Right, I'm leaving then. Don't bother me again, or I'll make you both breakfast in the morning." Chairman Meow nudged Church again, staring at him with large eyes.

"Are you okay?" Chairman Meow asked, and Church nodded, before turning his attention to the covered lid. He pat at it, his claws clinking against the glass. Alec pulled the lid off, and Chairman tried to jump in when the scent of the food hit his nose. Magnus caught the cat quickly, and Alec pulled the pan away just as fast, setting it back on the stove.

"I'm just going to put some on a plate, so they can share." Alec grabbed a ceramic plate, filling it with a pile of steaming meatballs and set it on the table. Magnus released the Chairman, the kitten launching on the pile of meatballs with a shrill meow. "By the Angel, did you feed him at all in the past week?"

"Yes. I think. Wanna have dinner in bed?" Magnus asked slyly. Alec wrinkled his nose.

"You're going to get sauce all over my sheets."

"And I can snap the stain away. In fact, I can snap the food up over there. Let's go back, right now." Magnus grabbed a sputtering Alec by the arms, literally _whirling_ him out of the room. Church huffed out a breath, shaking his head.

"Those two are so in love, it's ridiculous."

"Love?" The Chairman spoke up, looking at Church in confusion. "What is 'love'?"

"You don't know what love is?"

"No, can you eat it?"

"No." Chairman Meow looked disappointed. "Love is…a lot of things." Church told the younger cat, sitting back on his haunches. "It's what Alec and Magnus have. It's also what you and Magnus have. And you and Alec too, I guess." The Chairman looked confused, so Church elaborated. "It's the happy feeling you get when you're with someone you like." He explained, and the Chairman gave a mew of understanding.

"You and I have love too then, right?" The Chairman asked with a cheery smile. Church froze. Not what he'd been going for. The Chairman's ears drooped at the look on his face. "You don't feel happy when I'm around?" He asked, his voice wavering as he slouched down on the kitchen table. Church floundered at the tears in the Chairman's eyes, and he never floundered at anything.

"I...am very happy when you're around." Church said finally, the Chairman's tears melting away into delighted happiness.

"Good! Cause I love you too!" This wasn't going at all like the Church imagined.

"...alright?" He replied, his tail going rigid when Chairman rubbed against him affectionately.

"What do you do with people you love?" Chairman asked curiously. "Make the bed sheets smell funny?"

"Only humans do that." Church replied quickly, though it wasn't entirely true. "Cats, we...groom each other, and we sleep and eat together. That's_ all_."

"Like the other day!" Chairman chirped.

"Yes," Church said, relieved. He could handle Chairman Meow trying to burrow his way under his stomach so long as the kitten didn't try anything funny.

"Being in love sounds like so much fun!" The Chairman chirped, stretching out across the table. Church thought back through the years, remembering music and silver and pain.

"With humans it's not. Not entirely." Church amended, earning a confused look from the Chairman. The smaller cat seemed to think this over, the gears in his head turning as fast as they could.

"Well," Chairman Meow began, "I can see that, maybe fun's not the right word for it. I mean, all the warlock and human do sometimes is lie curled around each other and talk. That's not fun at all, but..." The kitten paused thoughtfully. "They still seem...whole." Church looked at the other cat, and the Chairman frowned. "Is that not good?" Church pictured Alec and Magnus wedged together so tightly you'd think they were joined somehow. He's seen plenty of humans like that in his time, and they hadn't always been happy, but that hadn't always been miserable. It was a confusing affair, but humans jumped through hoops and climbed mountains to be with the one they loved. There had to be some secret upside to the whole thing, why else would they do it? Church had seen people start off as children, looking awkward and out of place, only to find their mate and stay by their side for maybe a day, or maybe the rest of their lives, feeling that they belong. The result was the same though, one day their mate disappeared and left the other shattered beyond recognition. Like a shards of a broken window.

"No, whole is a wonderful way to describe it." He agreed, letting Chairman burrow back into his side, fitting much like a puzzle piece. Church would have preferred not ending up like a broken toy on the side of the road, but Chairman wouldn't have lasted a day without him in the real world, so he'd have to deal with it, for his sake.

* * *

A/N: And six months later, it is done! Also, Chairmanmeowww changed her url, but she knows this is for her, so yeah.

Reviews are adored!


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